Happy Festivus, Everyone!

December 23rd is the day to celebrate Festivus!

My favorite holiday. In case you don't remember here are the four main elements of Festivus as seein on Seinfeld:

The Festivus Pole: The Costanzas' tradition begins with an aluminum pole, which Frank praises for its "very high strength-to-weight ratio." During Festivus, the unadorned Festivus Pole is displayed. The pole was chosen apparently in opposition to the commercialization of highly decorated Christmas trees, because it is "very low-maintenance," and also because the holiday's patron, Frank Costanza, "find[s] tinsel distracting."

The Airing of Grievances: At the beginning of the Festivus dinner, each participant tells friends and family of all the instances where they disappointed him or her that year. As quoted from Frank Costanza: "I've got a lot of problems with you people, and now you're going to hear about it!"

Festivus dinner: In "The Strike," a celebratory dinner is shown on the evening of Festivus prior to the Feats of Strength. The on-air meal appeared to be meat loaf or spaghetti in a red sauce. In Festivus: The Holiday for the Rest of Us by Allen Salkin, drinking is encouraged with hearty beer, rum, bourbon, or wine. In the episode, no alcohol was served, but George Costanza's boss, Mr. Kruger, drank from a flask.

The Feats of Strength: After the dinner, the head of the family tests his or her strength against one participant of the head's choosing. Festivus is not considered over until the head of the family has been pinned to the ground. A participant is allowed to decline to attempt to pin the head of the family only if they have something better to do instead.

You can give your donation to the Human Fund to me.

I DID IT!

I passed! I got my letter from IAAP yesterday saying I had passed all the parts of the CPS exam and have achieved the Certified Professional Secretary rating!

Yay me!

So here was my score:

Part 1 - Office Systems Technolgy - passed - score: 898
Part 2 - Office Administration - passed - score: 816
Part 3 - Management - passed - score: 814

The score for each part was based on a scaled score of 450, so scoring 450 or higher is a pass.

You may now address me as Kristine Leibrand, CPS!

Thank You

We had a passel of firemen doing interviews in the conference room by my desk today. It was kind of fun to see these guys and listen to their stories. Boy, did they have some doozies.

Anyway, it made me realize what an extraordinary job these people have. I know I couldn't do it, so thank you to those of you that can!

I Licked a Slug

My friend Happy Papaya has a traveller that you can only get if you lick a slug. Up until recently, I hadn't earned that traveller. But now I can say, with much pride, that I have. At the ABCs of Halloween letterboxing gathering I went to back in October, while hunting for a box in the wrong place, I ran across a little slug. Egged on by my sick letterboxing buddies, I licked it. Here's my proof:





Have you guys heard that song called "I Kissed a Girl" by Katy Perry? (Check out this link at lala.com to listen for free) Yeah, well, every time I think about licking this slug this song pops into my head only re-titled "I Licked a Slug." Here are my new lyrics:

This was never the way I planned
Not my intention
I got so brave, logbook in hand
Lost my discretion
It's not what I'm used to
Just want the stamp
I'm curious about the stamp
Caught my attention

I licked a slug and I liked it
The taste of dirt and branches
I licked a slug just to try it
I hope the slug don't mind it
It felt so wrong
It felt so right
Now my tongue’s numb tonight
I licked a slug and I liked it
I liked it

No, I don't even know his name
It doesn't matter,
He was my experimental game
Just letterboxing nature,
It's what,
Good letterboxers do
Not how they should behave
My head gets so confused
Hard to obey

I licked a slug and I liked it
Just for a traveler
I licked a slug just to try it
I hope the slug don't mind it
It felt so wrong
It felt so right
Now my tongue’s numb tonight
I licked a slug and I liked it
I liked it

Those slugs are so magical
Slimy skin, brown lips, so lickable
Hard to resist so touchable
Too good to deny it
Ain't no big deal, it's innocent

I licked a slug and I liked it
The taste of dirt and branches
I licked a slug just to try it
I hope the slug don't mind it
It felt so wrong
It felt so right
Now my tongue’s numb tonight
I licked a slug and I liked it
I liked it

A songwriter I am not.

This Is So Me

Except I don't have the energy to even to that.

Only One More to Go

I am so sad. This Friday is the very last Monk episode. I love that show. It's witty, intelligent, and makes you think. Although they really should have hired Greg to be a consultant on Mr. Monk's quirks.

So we watched part one of the series finale last night. It created more questions than it answered. I can't stand not knowing who killed Trudy!!! I've been trying to cheat online and find out. Yeah, I'll read the last page of a mystery novel, too.

So who do you think did it? And why? I think there is a baby involved and that the judge did it.

Tune in Friday at 9:00 and see!

Goodbyes Are Hard

Today was Virginia's funeral. It was really very nice, but I cried through most of it. What an amazing woman she was. It's sad that I never got to learn some of those things until now.

I will miss her.

Silly Dogs

Greg & I stopped at our favorite pet store, Howl at the Moon, on Saturday and there was an artist there doing drawings of pets. We commissioned these prints of the girls. Aren't they great??

Good T-Shirts

Rough

Friday afternoon was really tough. I found out that one of my co-workers passed away the day before. Virginia was a great lady, very giving, very religous and very loving of her family. All of us in the department knew she had been ill, but she never shared with us that she was suffering from lung cancer. She's been out of the office on medical leave for about a month and a half so we knew it was serious. The last time I talked to her she said she had been in the hospital and it turned out she had pneumonia on top of the cancer. Her poor heart couldn't take the strain.

Her husband and son came to tell the bosses together on Friday afternoon and they gathered all the employees together to tell us. Everyone was so shocked. It's really sad.

We'll miss you Virginia. I know you are in heaven with the members of your family that have gone on before you, but check back in with us once in a while. You will be missed.

Catch Up

I wish I had some really exciting reason to relate to you all and explain why I have neglected my little blog. I don’t though. I’m just boring. AND now that I found out my most ardent fan is without a computer I know why I’m not getting any comments on my blog, so what’s the point?

Seriously though, I haven’t been doing anything all that exciting.

I've gone to physical therapy for my carpel tunnel, which is actually helping.

I had a crown prep. That totally sucked. I had a lot of trouble with this one. the tooth was cracked and it turned out there was a cavity under the current filling, so they drilled and drilled and drilled and had to shoot me up with Novocaine twice. Then I couldn't eat or talk very well for two days. It sucked even more when the temporary crown broke three days later and I had to go and get a new one made. I get the real one installed on November 30th. I'm really hoping that the pain will go away. I hate having dental work done. And I have fillings in all of my molars because i had "cracks" in my teeth when I was a kid and the stupid dentist put fillings in all of them. Now it's 30 years later and those fillings are starting to break down. I'm probably going to have to have a bunch more crowns. I can't wait.

Last Sunday was great. I had rescheduled my play from the weekend I went to take my CPS test to a matinee and my friend Leah was able to go with us. We met for lunch at a cool little restaurant called Zappos in LO and then went to the play.

Got a little letterboxing in on the weekend, too. Before I went to lunch with Leah, I stopped and picked up a few letterboxes at Foothills Park. It's the coolest little park that is right over by the apartments I lived in in 1991-1992. Ah, those were the days. It was so nostalgic to drive by there and see my old apartment (5055 D). Those apartments are condominiums now. And we were the first ones to live there. which was pretty cool. Anyway, where the big piles of sawdust were is now a lovely park with paths, beautiful grass, and some nice statues...and some letterboxes!

The Man Who Came to Dinner was the play we went to see. It was really well done. It was a huge cast and the actor that played the main character was awesome. He's very involved in the Gresham theater scene and I've actually met him a couple of times.

Aside from that. Not much going on. More later.

'Twas the Month Before Christmas

Okay, I know I'm being slightly hypocritical in posting this Christmas-themed poem before Thanksgiving is over, but it is so good I couldn't wait. Besides, I should just give in since they are now having countdowns to the 25 days of Christmas on TV. Only 7 more days until the 25 days before Christmas!

Twas the month before Christmas
When all through our land,
Not a Christian was praying
Nor taking a stand.
See the PC Police had taken away
The reason for Christmas - no one could say.
The children were told by their schools not to sing
About Shepherds and Wise Men and Angels and things.
It might hurt people's feelings, the teachers would say
December 25th is just a ' Holiday '.
Yet the shoppers were ready with cash, checks and credit
Pushing folks down to the floor just to get it!
CDs from Madonna, an X BOX, an I-Pod
Something was changing, something quite odd!
Retailers promoted Ramadan and Kwanzaa
In hopes to sell books by Franken & Fonda.
As Targets were hanging their trees upside down
At Lowe's the word Christmas - was no where to be found.
At K-Mart and Staples and Penny's and Sears
You won't hear the word Christmas; it won't touch your ears.
Inclusive, sensitive, Di-ver-si-ty
Are words that were used to intimidate me.
Now Daschle, Now Darden, Now Sharpton, Wolf Blitzen
On Boxer, on Rather, on Kerry, on Clinton!
At the top of the Senate, there arose such a clatter
To eliminate Jesus, in all public matter.
And we spoke not a word, as they took away our faith
Forbidden to speak of salvation and grace
The true Gift of Christmas was exchanged and discarded
The reason for the season, stopped before it started.
So as you celebrate 'Winter Break' under your 'Dream Tree'
Sipping your Starbucks, listen to me.
Choose your words carefully, choose what you say
Shout MERRY CHRISTMAS ,
not Happy Holiday!
Please, all Christians join together and
wish everyone you meet
MERRY CHRISTMAS
Christ is The Reason' for the Christ-mas Season!

Well That Was a Big Waste of Time

I went down to Salem and took the certified professional secretary exam. I don't have a great feeling about it. I think I probably passed the Office Systems and Technology exam, but I have a feeling I'll be back in Salem come May retaking the Management and Office Administration portions.

Well, at least I tried, right? Next time I'll try to put a little more effort into it. If I didn't pass it's my own stupid fault for not studying.

I'm such a looser.

It's That Time of Year Again!

Yes, the time of year where I get totally annoyed at the commercialism of Christmas. I'm actually a little late with the annual rant this year. Usually I see Christmas stuff out before Halloween and I just can't hold it in any longer. Maybe I'm maturing, I don't know.

Anyway. Here's the rule: NO CHRISTMAS ITEMS OUT UNTIL AFTER THANKSGIVING!! I did notice people sneaking them in with the Halloween candy this year. I imagine that with the recession and all (you know, in these tough economic times...) that retailers are going to be more rabid that usual trying to get people to part with their hard earned cash to buy meaningless stuff for their loved ones.

Not me! I've officially canceled all Christmas gift-giving. Mom...this means you. Let's just spend some time together rather than spend money on gifts.

Please people. Let's get through one holiday at a time before we move on to the next one.

Some Days it Doesn't Pay to Get Out of Bed

Today was one of those days. I got up at a reasonable time, let the dogs out, did the shower thing. Everything was going okay until I went to get dressed. Haven't kept up with the laundry so all my favorite clothes were in the wash. Put on a dress and nylons. Wearing nylons is a pain in the patootie on the best of days, but it is really difficult with my CT. So I put them on and they run the first time I sit down. Then I realize there is a button missing on the sweater. And it's really too tight to be attractive. Take off the dress. Change to a skirt and sweater. Um, those are a bit too tight as well. Take off sweater & skirt and ditch the nylons. Pick out a pants outfit (no nylons needed)...WTF? Too tight????? And the jacket has short sleeves so you can totally see the tape my physical therapist put on my arm to help the CT. Tacky and tight. Nice combo.

Finally dig out some pants and a sweater that don't make me look like a sausage. Go downstairs to put on shoes and socks. Spill glass of water all over lap. Great. Now I'm soaked. No time to change even if there was something else to wear.

Go into bathroom to do hair. Best not to describe this debacle. Am now seriously considering calling it a day and going back to bed, but I've set up this training for this morning that I really want to attend.

So I made it to work in one piece. That's all I'm asking for today.

Hopefully, things will get better.

Saturday Totally Rocked!

Well, the ABC's of Halloween Gathering was a total blast. I'm exhilarated, exhausted, and sore.

Here is the day broken down by numbers:
1 hot chocolate
1 bacon breakfast burrito
9 hours of boxing with good friends
62 boxes
3 exchanges
8 miles of walking
3 bottles of water
1 faceplant on the trail
1 pair of totally ripped pants
10,000,000 laughs
1 mimosa
700 hugs
1 really, really great day

Hot Spot

Saturday Will ROCK!

Sig stamp? Check.
Log in sig stamp stickers (because of CT)? Check.
Pens & stamp pads? Check.
Travelers? Check.
Log book? Check.
Letterboxing bag? Check - cleaned out and ready to go.
Bestest letterboxing friends buddies set to box with? Check.
Lemon Cheesecake Bars? Ingredients ready, will bake them on Friday night.
Clues? Hoping Maiden has them!

Squee! I’m ready for the ABC’s of Halloween Gathering on Saturday at Lewisville Park in Battle Ground.

Nothing New

There is nothing new in my life. My carpal tunnel is really acting up, so I'm not spending much time on the computer.

Don't hate me.

Something New

Greg and I did something today that we have never done in the 17 years we've been together. We went shopping for baby things. Lest you get the wrong idea, let me clear up any misconceptions that sentance may bring to mind. We had to go find baby socks to keep Sophie's foot covered.

You wouldn't think that finding baby socks would be that difficult, would you? I went to Walmart thinking I would have no trouble there. HA! There are about 12,000 different kinds and I just wanted a basic sock. Do you know how many sizes and textures baby socks come in? And not one of them is labeled for Whippets. So after going to Walmart and Target and Dollar Tree, and spending WAAAAY to much time trying to figure out which size we needed I finally ended up getting a package of the toddler socks at the dollar store. They work fine and now I can wash her little pink one which was looking pretty dirty already.

Then we decided to go find some booties for her so she could go outside without a baggie over her foot. That was entertaining. After spending over an hour at PetSmart trying to decide which ones to get and then what size we should get, we finally settled on some cute little pink bootie-type "muttluck" type ones. Just in case you are ever looking for baby socks for your dog, they have them at PetSmart. I am not even kidding.

I'll post a picture of Sophie in her new boots later. She's annoyed enough with me for now because I changed her sock.

Sophie Has a Boo-Boo

Poor Sophie. She has a boo-boo on her foot. When we were out at the dog park on Sunday she came up lame and when I looked at her foot there was blood on it, but I couldn't see a tear or anything stuck in between her pads. She didn't seem too bothered by it, so we continued on and went to the CASEE center. While we were there, she came up lame again and started yelping. I told her she was being a big drama queen.

Imagine how bad I felt today when Greg took the girls to get their nails cut and the groomer said she had a big cut between her pads, deep down. The cut is up between the front two pads, which are very close together and thick with webbing in between the toes. Here's a picture (this isn't the best picture of the bottom of a whippet's foot, but it was the best I could find. The web obviously needs more pictures of whippet feet):

Greg took her to the vet and spent two hours and $140 we didn't have and all Sophie got was a pink bootie. They confirmed it was a cut, cleaned it out, wrapped it up and sent her home with some pain pills and antibiotics. They put the cutest little sock on it.



We are supposed to soak it in a weak bettadine solution and put antibiotic ointment in it.

Here she is with her special pink sock. Isn't it cute?


She's not supposed to go outside with it uncovered, so when I let her out earlier I put some foil around it. I thought this was a brilliant idea, but sadly, it fell off. I think tomorrow I'll go and get some of those dog boots for cold weather to give it more protection.



She is banned from the dog park for two weeks, poor thing. She's going to hate that!

Cleo's New Tent

Remember a while back I mentioned that we had gotten a screened tent for the cats to safely enjoy the outdoors and it was a miserable failure? Well, I found another one that works much better.

Here's her little pop-up tent. It's awesome because it folds up as one piece and you just drop it on the ground and poof! It's all set up for you.


Here's Cleo zipped in all safe and sound.


I'm not at all sure she likes it, but she hasn't complained yet.


I haven't tried Zinger in it yet. He may like it, but I'm not sure he's brave enough to find out.

Oh, Barf

Did you see that Obama got a Nobel Peace prize for world peace? Give me a break. Normally, the management here at Random Thoughts shies away from expressing their political views, but in this case I can truly say I am totally disgusted. He hasn't done anything but shoot his mouth off yet!

Okay, that's enough expressing my outrage. Oh, wait. No it's not...


Now I'm done.

Snort.

Wonderful Fall Day

We had a wonderful fall day today. It was in the upper 60s, blue sky, light breeze, warm sunshine. I slept in then read kinda late into the morning, which was wonderful. We decided to take the dogs to the park and before we left I was looking at Atlas Quest and found that there were some new boxes planted at the CASEE (Center for Agriculture, Science and Environmental Education) Center. We've driven by there 10,000 times on the way to the dog park. I've always wanted to stop in here and look at it, but we've never taken the time.

Deciding we'd take the dogs to the park AND go letterboxing, we stopped at the center. We had a great time walking around here. We were the only people there so we let the dogs off leash to run around the trails. They simply ADORE going leashless in the woods. They were running around with big happy smiles on their faces. I'm sure they were eating all kinds of disgusting things, too, but hey, they were having a good time.

We found 4 letterboxes there, which was totally awesome, and spent a couple of hours just walking through the woods, around the wetlands, and in the community garden.

There are several different garden types there like a butterfly garden, a hummingbird garden and a bee garden.

Here are some pretty flowers from the Butterfly Garden.


These were in the Hummingbird garden. I have no idea what kind of flowers they are, but they sure were pretty!


Me and the girls by a funny little "scarecrow" made of a bucket and some piping.


Greg and the girls not wanting their picture taken. Notice Carmen hacking up something in the bottom left of the picture. Lovely.

Here's me stamping in at one of the boxes.

I loved this water pump with the pretty flowers. Greg took this picture.


Anyway, it was a wonderful day spent with my favorite people outside during my favorite time of year doing my favorite sport. What else could I ask for?

Colds Suck

I haven't updated my blog in a while because I have been doing nothing exciting. I've got a cold. It started last Tuesday and I spent 3 days at home hacking and blowing. I'm still sniffling and coughing (and probably spreading my cold germs EVERYWHERE) but at least I don't feel like something I scraped of my shoe when I got home from the dog park.

I spent the weekend watching a Brady Bunch marathon. Surprisingly, I never got bored. And I learned a lot of good moral lessons. And how not to dress. I wish they'd played the Brady Bunch movie, though. That is THE best movie about a TV show ever done.

Got a new screened tent for the cat. More about that in another post. (that's a teaser for you!)

Aside from singlehandedly depleating all the trees used for making kleenex, I haven't been doing anything interesting.

I'm off to blow my nose...again.

Note: When the cold pill box says to take every 4 hours, they mean that the pills will completely stop working 3 hours and 59 minutes after you swallow them. They aren't kidding either.

Another Goodbye

We have another goodbye to give today. My mom and dad had to put their kitty Patches to sleep yesterday. She had lung cancer and it turned out that they couldn't do anything for her.

Patches was a beautiful cat. I don't have any pictures here I can post of her, but I'll try and find one. She had a beautiful brown and cream coat and lovely blue eyes. She was a fined boned kitty with short silky fur and a long brown tail. She never really liked me, but that was part of her kitty charm.

She will be missed very much.

If it should be that I grow frail and weak
And pain should keep me from my sleep,
Then will you do what must be done,
For this -- the last battle -- can't be won.
You will be sad I understand,
But don't let grief then stay your hand,
For on this day, more than the rest,
Your love and friendship must stand the test.
We have had so many happy years,
You wouldn't want me to suffer so.
When the time comes, please, let me go.
Take me to where to my needs they'll tend,
Only, stay with me till the end
And hold me firm and speak to me
Until my eyes no longer see.
I know in time you will agree
It is a kindness you do to me.
Although my tail its last has waved,
From pain and suffering I have been saved.
Don't grieve that it must be you
Who has to decide this thing to do;
We've been so close -- we two -- these years,
Don't let your heart hold any tears.


Author Unknown

Screen House - A Disaster

Well, as I suspected getting a screened tent thingy for the cat was a total disaster. I let Greg talk me into getting a big one that can go over a picnic table rather than the little (and more expensive) one that was designed for cats. The one we got was admittedly a cheap one, but it was impossible to put up and didn't have a bottom in it, so the cats could just walk under it. Which was my argument from the beginning. It took us forever to put it together and then we couldn't get it to stay up. Stupid design.

I took Zinger out and put him in it and he totally FREAKED out. Poor guy. I've mentioned before that Zinger is a big ole fraidy cat. Well, this didn't help. When I put him down he dashed away, ran headlong into the screened wall twice before he found the opening and zipped back into the house. The whole event took less than five seconds.

Cleo actually hung out in there for a while. I think she was trying to make us feel better.

So a trip back to WalMart is in order to return this thing. I think I'll be ordering the cat one.

Goodbye to Q

Sad news today, I'm afraid. I came in to work this morning and found that my fishy Q was dead. His bubbler tube tipped over sometime last night and he must have swum into it and then couldn't get out. Poor guy. Bettas are air breathers so he must have drowned. How ironic is that? A fish drowning.

My desk looks very empty without his tank there. I'll miss his inquisitive little fishy face checking out everyone who came up to my desk. He had quite a following around the city.

R.I.P little fishy.

What I've Been Up To

Time sure flies these days! I haven’t written anything for a while. I haven’t even managed to update my “What I’m Reading” section. Guess I won’t be NaBloPoMo for September!

So, what have I been up to, you ask? Not too much. Here are some highlights:

Went to the home & garden / RV show - that was pretty cool. It’s been a while since we looked at RVs. Things have sure changed in the industry. Several of the companies that make trailers have gone out of business. We are still thinking about selling the house and living in a trailer full time. We’ve been kicking around this idea for a long time, and I think Greg has finally talked me into it. More about this at a later date.

Did the Strut Your Mutt walk. The walk was fun. It was at Lacamas Lake in Camas. We thought we got there early and beat the crowd, but later I got an email from Second Chance Companions and was disappointed to hear that only 16 people participated and they raised less than $700. They plan to make this an annual event, so hopefully they will have lots more people next year.

Spent a week working many hours on the budget document at work. I think I worked 15 hours of overtime last week – and that was a short week because of Labor Day.

As a result of the work on the document, I’ve really hurt my shoulder and have numbness and pain shooting down my arm and into my hand. I guess since I was doing so much work on the document which included a lot of mouse work, I over used it. This totally sucks because it hurts to use the computer…meaning I can’t play Farm Town as much! Gasp! I’ve been trying to use my left hand to mouse, but it is so awkward. I get frustrated at how slow I am and before I know it I'm back to right hand mousing.

I did go get a massage to help the neck and shoulder. It was soooo wonderful. This place only charges $39 for an hour, which is awesome. My insurance doesn’t cover it, but I don’t mind paying 40 bucks. The other places I’ve gone have been $60 for an hour!

My neighbor got a kitten. His name is Dean Martin – Deano for short. He is so cute! I love kittens. We went over to meet him the other and got a kitten fix. They had to put their older kitty to sleep last week and said the house was just so empty without a cat that they had to go get a new one.

Cleo has been very weird the last couple of weeks…she’s been jumping in the trash, running around, trying to get in the window, clawing everything, and trying to sneak out every time someone opens the door. It’s annoying. I think we’ll have to get her one of those little houses that she can be in outside.

I got my 2010 calendar. I know that sounds really boring, but I always love getting the next year’s calendar. It seems like I’m always looking out for the perfect calendar (much like the quest for the perfect bag). I’ve tried really expensive ones that have lots of ways to keep you organized and have lots of areas to write in to-dos and even have and hour by hour section. I’m not so good with those. I’ve finally found one I like. It’s just a monthly calendar, but I really like it. Lots of room to write in the days and a place to store reminder cards and stuff. Best of all, I got it at the dollar store! How awesome is that? The other planner-type calendar was $40+ each year. This one is a buck.

Got my car washed and vacuumed out. I love Washman Car Wash. For twenty-five bucks (including tip) I can get the car washed and waxed, have it vacuumed and the windows cleaned and the doors wiped down. It’s so great. I totally hate doing it myself and sure don’t mind paying less than an hour's pay to get it done.

I think I'm getting a cold and I'm not at all happy about it. I've been feeling progressively crappier as the day goes on. My throat is all scratchy and no matter how much water I drink I can't seem to make it better. Now my nose just started running. A great big sarcastic "Thank You" to all of you employees that came to work sick!

Twenty-Nine Lines to Make you Smile

1. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't.
2. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
3. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.
4. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
5. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.
6. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
7. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
8. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
9. I'm not a complete idiot -- some parts are just missing.
10. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
11. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine.
12. God must love stupid people; He made so many.
13. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
14. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
15. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
16. Being 'over the hill' is much better than being under it!
17. Wrinkled was not one of the things I wanted to be when I grew up.
18. Procrastinate now!
19. I Have a degree in Liberal Arts; do you want fries with that?
20. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
21. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
22. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!
23. They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.
24. He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD.
25. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.
26. Ham and eggs... A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.
27. The trouble with life is there's no background music.
28. The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson.
29. I smile because I don't know what is going on.

Why I'm Not a Parent

PARENT - Job Description

This is hysterical. If it had been presented this way, I don't believe any of us would have done it!!!!

POSITION TITLE :
Mom, Mommy, Mama, Ma
Dad, Daddy, Dada, Pa, Pop

JOB DESCRIPTION :

Long term, team players needed, for challenging, permanent work in an often chaotic environment.

Candidates must possess excellent communication and organizational skills and be willing to work variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends and frequent 24 hour shifts on call.

Some overnight travel required, including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities!

Travel expenses not reimbursed. Extensive courier duties also required.

RESPONSIBILITIES :

The rest of your life. Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, until someone needs $5. Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly. Also, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule and be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat in case, this time, the screams from the backyard are not someone just crying wolf. Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, such as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets and stuck zippers. Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars and coordinate production of multiple homework projects.
Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings for clients of all ages and mental outlooks. Must be a willing to be indispensable one minute, an embarrassment the next. Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a half million cheap, plastic toys, and battery operated devices. Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst.

Must assume final, complete accountability for the quality of the end product.

Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and janitorial work throughout the facility.

POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT & PROMOTION :

None.
Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills, so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you.

PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE :

None required, unfortunately.
On-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis.

WAGES AND COMPENSATION :

Get this! You pay them!
Offering frequent raises and bonuses.


A balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because of the assumption that college will help them become financially independent. When you die, you give them whatever is left. The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that you actually enjoy it and wish you could only do more.

BENEFITS :

While no health or dental insurance , no pension, no tuition reimbursement , no paid holidays and no stock options are offered; this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth, unconditional love, and free hugs and kisses for life if you play your cards right.

NaBloPoMo - DONE!

Well, my faithful readers, my National Blog Posting Month is done. I posted every day in August, which was my goal. I never said they had to be posts of any kind of substance, but I did post every day. I even got a guest poster in there (that was Greg, by the way).

So I hope you enjoyed (or even noticed) my daily posts in August. We now return you to our regularly scheduled program of whenever I get around to it.

That is all.

Texting Can Be Deadly

I saw this clip on someone else's blog the other day and I can't stop thinking about it. This is pretty graphic and I can't quite figure out how they filmed it, but it makes you stop and think.



I know none of you would text while driving, so I'm preaching to the choir, but pass this video on to those that you know who do.

Trying to Be a Travel Agent Again

I used to be a travel agent. I booked reservations for people going on vacation all the time. I was pretty good at it, too. Today, I've been trying to find a package for Greg and his mom and me to visit San Francisco to see the King Tut exhibit, and I am having a HECK of a time. Can someone remind me how I used to do it? You'd think it would be way easier with the internet, but I think there are too many choices now!

So, has anyone stayed in San Francisco that can help me out? We ultimately want to end up at the De Young Museum in Golden Gate Park, which is about 20 miles from the airport. Would I be okay staying by the airport (which seems to be cheaper than down by the hotel) or am I going to be really mad that I booked a hotel so far away? Should I bite the bullet and pay $100 more a night for a hotel that doesn't have bed bugs? This is HARD!

Long Day

Whew. It's been a long day. Greg & I took the girls to the Strut Your Mutt walk, which was fun, but disappointingly underattended. We got there about 9:30, checked in, and started the walk before it actually started. We wanted to beat the crowds. Turns out there wasn't really a crowd to beat, but it was a nice walk at Lacamas Lake anyway. I'll post pictures tomorrow.

Then we spent the rest of the day looking for a chair for Greg. We drove all over the east side of Portland and hit almost every furniture store from Clackamas to Gresham. Who knew chair shopping was so exhausting?

We finally did find one for him. I hope he will finally be comfortable sitting in his own living room now. Keep your fingers crossed!

Stolen Off of Deb’s Facebook Page

I stole this off of Deb's Facebook page this morning.

Here are the ABCs of Me for your entertainment today.

A - Age: 39

B - Bed size: Queen, but it feels like a twin with two whippets who always hog the bed

C - Chore you hate: cleaning…especially the bathroom

D - Dog's name(s): Carmen and Sophie

E - Essential start your day item: Alarm clock

F - Favorite color(s): Green and purple

G - Gold or Silver: Gold

H - Height: 5'3"

I - Instruments you play: The radio, my iPod

J - Job title: administrative assistant

K - Kids: none

L - Living arrangements: house in Vancouver with hubby, 2 dogs, 2 cats, 2 bettas

M - Mom's name: Linda

N - Nicknames: Kris, Krissy, Bookworm, Midnight Flamingo

O - Overnight hospital stay other than birth: None; just day surgery stuff

P - Pet Peeve: Just one? I don’t know if I can narrow it down. How about: people that try to squeeze in to your lane at the last minute when they knew good and well that they needed that lane and just did it to not have to wait the half you just waited.

Q - Quote from a movie: "Does anyone ever ask you if you have a case of the Mondays?" "No, no, man. If someone did that, they'd get their ass kicked.” (I’m so sorry to copy, Deb, but this is my FAVORITE, too!)

R - Right or left handed: right

S - Siblings: None

T - Time you wake up: 5 am

U - Underwear: Yes…white cotton granny panties

V - Vegetable you dislike: Lima beans

W - Workout style: None. Oh, wait, yes, I do have one…letterboxing. I’ll happily hike 8 miles in a day for letterboxes.

X - X-rays you've had: left arm, right ankle, teeth, and I’m sure there are others I’ve forgotten

Y - Yesterday's best moment(s): Going to bed

Z - Zoo favorite: Flamingos (except the Oregon Zoo doesn’t have any. Can you believe that???)

Random, unplanned, spontaneous, drive-by guest post

That is all.
Please stay tuned.

I Need $305.90

I just found the ultimate jigsaw puzzle. Look at this puppy:



It’s called “Life, The Greatest Puzzle” and it is a mere 24,000 pieces. The thing measures 169” x 62” That’s 14.05 feet x 5.18 feet!

It’s a mere $289.95 plus $15.95 for shipping (the thing weighs 25 pounds, so that’s pretty good, actually).

And, according to the web site, no one from Washington or Oregon has put it together yet. At least not and gotten credit for it. Although why you would put together a 24,000 piece puzzle and not brag the hell out of it, I can’t imagine.

Strut Your Mutt

I am participating in a fundraiser for Second Chance Companions called Strut Your Mutt on August 29. Join me at Lacamas Park in Camas for the walk or make a pledge donation through me to this worthy charity today!

Second Chance Companions is a 501(c)3 non-profit pet adoption and referral organization dedicated to helping find deserving homes for animals in SW Washington and the Portland metro area who are homeless, or about to be homeless. They are a humane, no-kill organization staffed entirely by dedicated volunteers.

Although SCC does not run an independent shelter, they maintain a list of hundreds of pets just waiting to have a family of their own. If you are interested in adopting, and committed to providing a loving home for the duration of a pet's lifetime, please contact them.

Grumpy

I'm feeling grumpy tonight. Let's list why:

I'm not feeling good and I better not be getting sick from some fool who came to work with a cold and passed it on to me.

My copy of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix that is on my iPod (and iTunes) is missing at least 2 disks, which really annoys me.

My stupid freaking, frigging, fracking, futzing computer is so s l o w that it is driving me INSANE!

I can't decide where to take my vacaction.

I woke up drooling this morning.

I have a toothache.

Greg is mad at me that I've been spending so much time on stupid Farm Town.

I'm going to bed. Thank God this day is over.

My Favorite Toy

My favorite toy as a child was my doll. I had quite a few dolls, but my favorite ones were the Fisher Price My Friend Mandy dolls.

I had My Friend Mandy,

My Friend Jenny,

and later, My Friend Becky.


I clearly remember getting my first My Friend Mandy doll for Christmas in 1977. I was so thrilled! I actually had two Mandy dolls (first issue with pink rosebuds on her body and the second issue with yellow rosebuds on her body). I think I called the second one Mindy.

My cousin Deb had a Mandy doll, too. I think I probably made her name it something else, because I was bossy and older. We had so much fun with those dolls. We probably played the equivalent of 5 years straight with them.

Of course, being that I was a spoiled only child, I had every outfit imaginable for those dolls. I remember going to Toys-R-Us and looking to see if any new ones had been released and being so excited when there was something new. My mom made me a ton more clothes for them, too.

Deb's daughter Samantha has them now. I hope she is enjoying them as much as her mother and I did when we were little girls. I wonder if anyone has a picture of us playing with those dolls? That would make an awesome scrapbook page.

500th Post

Hey, I missed it, but yesterday's post was the 500th post since I started my blog. Whee!

It's amazing how I have managed to post 500 times with nothing interesting to say.

Zoo Pictures

Here are some pictures of my trip to the zoo yesterday. Because my computer is so old and slow I can't use Elements any more, so I can't clean these pictures up at all.

I can't remember what these animals were called. I think they look like whippets with an extra long neck. They are very elegant.


I have 10,000 pictures of Samudra the baby elephant. Here he is laying on his side, showing off.


Here's Samudra by his mom's legs.


Samudra walking.


A monkey. Don't remember what kind, but I like his face.


All the lorikeets were molting, so they didn't look all that pretty. This one posed nicely for me in the tree so I couldn't see his ratty feathers.


A giraffe eating. They are very elegant looking animals, too.


Some kind of duck. Should do better at remembering the names, huh?


Here's a red lorikeet.


This Zebra was lounging in the sun. He looked so comfortable. When I looked closer I saw that you could see his teeth!



I have lots more pictures, mostly of Samudra. But you can watch the video on the post before this one if you want to see how cute he is!

Look at the Baby!

The baby elephant will be a year old on Sunday, but I finally got to the zoo to see him. I got a little video of him playing in the water. It's not great, but it is cute. Ignore the stupid talking in the background. I haven't figured out how to turn the sound off yet.

Meetings Suck

I hate night meetings. Once a month I am the administrative support for the finance committee and have a meeting that starts at 7 p.m. and goes until around 9 p.m. My alarm goes off at 5:00 a.m. and I generally leave the house about 6:00 - 6:15 a.m. I start work at 7.

If you can do math at all, you can tell this makes for a very, very long day. I usually take an hour or so before the meeting to eat and have a break, but it still ends up being at least a 12 hour day.

I have to say though, that the comp time is appreciated!

P.S. If you look at the time on this post you might wonder how I managed to get this post done when I was supposed to be in a meeting. Two words: Boring meeting!

Five Questions I Need Answers To

1. What is fun about “fun sized” candy bars? They are tiny. What is fun about that? Wouldn’t the giant sized candy bars be a lot more fun?

2. If Bruce Lee movies weren’t so badly dubbed, would they still be stupid? (although the fighting is totally kick a$$)

3. Why do all the movies they play on “Movies That Don’t Suck” actually suck? Is this supposed to be irony?

4. Why do all firemen seem to have mustaches?

5. Why does it always rain right after you wash your car?

Zinger is Such A Treat Snob

After we ran out of kitty Greenies, I tried to find them at several stores with no luck. So I had to buy some cheap knock off treats...Pounce or something. Cleo will eat them just fine, but Zinger would rather go without treats than to eat such plebian fare.

Tonight I forgot and grabbed the old treats, and sure enough, he wouldn't eat them. I brought out the Greenies (same flavor...beef) and he was more than happy to nibble on a few.

He's such a weird cat sometimes.

Dishwasher

I love my dishwasher. I can put dirty dishes in it and they come out clean. I know. You are wondering why that is such a revelation since that is what dishwashers are supposed to do. That's not how it worked at my house until recently.

When we built our house 11 years ago, we didn't really think much about the dishwasher when we chose our appliances. Wherever they could this home builder put in cheap crap. We were too stupid to realize that included the appliances, so we just got the basic old dishwasher. Right from the start you had to wash the dishes before putting them in the dishwasher. As time went on, you had to make sure they were a little bit cleaner. Then they had to practically be clean before putting them in the dishwasher. Then finally, a few months ago the dishwasher died.

Those of you who know me, know that I am really lazy and hate doing dishes. I'll let them all pile up on the counter until we have no clean dishes before I'll haul my butt in there and do it. I know, if you do a little at a time it doesn't take as long. But if you have to wash the dishes before putting them in the dishwasher to get clean it's really annoying, so I just didn't like to do it.

After the old dishwasher died, we bought one that said you could just put the dishes in it without pre-washing. Yeah, right. I wasn't going to believe that. It took me a few loads to get it. You CAN put dirty dishes in the dishwasher and have them come out clean! It's a total miracle!

You can put a week old bowl that was used for oatmeal in the dishwasher without pre-cleaning it and have it come out sparkling clean!

I know. I need to get out more since a dishwasher can make my day. Sad, isn't it?

From My Inbox

Some of the artists of the 60's are revising their hits with new lyrics to accommodate aging baby boomers. They include:

Bobby Darin ---
Splish, Splash, I Was Havin' a Flash.

Herman's Hermits ---
Mrs. Brown, You've Got a Lovely Walker .

Ringo Starr ---
I Get By With a Little Help From Depends.

The Bee Gees -- -
How Can You Mend a Broken Hip.

Roberta Flack---
The First Time Ever I Forgot Your Face.

Johnny Nash ---
I Can't See Clearly Now.

Paul Simon---
Fifty Ways to Lose Your Liver

The Commodores ---
Once, Twice, Three Times to the Bathroom.

Marvin Gaye ---
I Heard It Through the Grape Nuts.

Procol Harem---
A Whiter Shade of Hair.

Leo Sayer ---
You Make Me Feel Like Napping.

The Temptations ---
Papa's Got a Brand New Kidney Stone.
Abba---
Denture Queen.

Tony Orlando ---
Knock 3 Times On The Ceiling If You Hear Me Fall.

Helen Reddy ---
I Am Woman, Hear Me Snore.

Leslie Gore ---
It's My Procedure, and I'll Cry If I Want To.

And Last but NOT least

Willie Nelson ---
On the Commode Again

Lucy The Slut

For all my musical friends out there. I found this "interview" with Avenue Q's star, Lucy the Slut and thought I'd share! The rest of you won't get this, but that's okay.

Lucy The Slut — star of Broadway's long-running musical Avenue Q — fills out Playbill.com's questionnaire with random facts, backstage trivia and pop culture tidbits.




Full given name:
Lucy The Slut

Hometown:
None of your f#@%ing business

Zodiac sign:
What's the one with the crabs? That one.

Audition song:
Oh, sugar, I don't audition. I get offered gigs outright. Though sometimes I do hafta seal the deal by dancing one of my specialties: the Backseat Samba, the Horizontal Hula, or the Mattress Mambo.

Special skills:
Ball juggling, cigar smoking, pony riding, muffin buttering, carpet cleaning, candlewick dipping, nut cracking, rock climbing, tool grinding, pipe laying, clock winding, pearl diving, and basket weaving.

First Broadway show ever saw:
Does the peep show at 42nd and 8th count? Changed my life…

If you could go back in time and catch any Broadway show, what would it be?
I'd rather meet my Broadway boys after they're done for the night and slam dollar shots at the Port Authority bowling alley. That's Broadway for me.

Current show you have been recommending to friends:
I WAS recommending In the Heights as a favor to Lin-Manuel, cuz he and I had our own little weekly matinee in his dressing room, but ever since he left the show, that [Spanish expletive] doesn't return my calls.

Favorite show tune:
Is "Superfreak" from a musical?

Most played song on your iPod:
"%#@$ the Pain Away" by Peaches

Web obsession:
I don't obsess about the internet, men on the internet obsess about me.

Last book you read:
"The Selected Works of T.S. Spivet" — why are you looking at me like that? I read. Motherf#@%er.

Must-see TV show:
"Hung"

Last good movie you saw:
"Harry Potter and the Half-Pierced Prince Albert"

Favorite board/card game:
Take your pick: Strip Poker, Strip Go Fish, Strip Twister, Strip Boggle

Performer you would drop everything to go see:
Lover, I did drop everything to see Justin Timberlake, if you know what I mean. And believe you me, the view was tasty.

Pop culture guilty pleasure:
I'm only admittin' this cuz I'm on my third Long Island Iced Tea, but I love that "Tori and Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood." Their disgustingly sweet relationship almost makes me want to get hitched myself someday. Then it goes to commercial and I come back to my senses.

First stage kiss:
Does it count as a kiss if it wasn't my lips? Or his?

Worst onstage mishap:
I'm a professional. Whenever something goes wrong on stage, I know how to handle it so no one ever remembers. I flash my %#$&.

Who have you played on "Law & Order"? Which edition?
I've come so close to playing almost every dead hooker you've ever seen on those shows, but they always decide to go with someone "less fuschia and less felty."

Pets' names?
I have a snake named Pleasure and a gerbil named Richard. I keep them separated.

Favorite junk food:
Hot dogs and popsicles.

Who would play you in the movie?
Chelsea Handler

Leading lady role you've been dying to play:
Hedda Gabler. Don't look at me like that. I have range! Motherf%$#ing…

Shuffle Part 2

I did this post back in May 2008, but I thought it would be fun to do it again, especially now that I have uploaded my entire library on my iPod.

RULES:
1. Put Your iTunes, Windows Media Player, ETC on Shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS. (I’m going to make one exception here because I have so many books on tape on my iPod, I’ll press next until I hit an actual song.)
4. Put any comments in brackets after the song name.
5. Put this on your journal.


1. If someone says, "Is this okay?" You say?

Under Separate Cover from the musical A Class Act

2. How would you describe yourself?

Careless Whispers by WHAM!

3. What do you like in a guy?

Romancin’ the Blues by Linda Eder

4. How do you feel today?

Let Me Finish! From the musical Song and Dance

5. What is your life's purpose?

Streak of Madness from the musical Jekyll & Hyde

6. What is your motto?

Roam by the B52’s.

7. What do your friends think of you?

Jerusalem by Charlotte CHurch

8. What do you think of your parents?

Let’s Stay Together by Pat Benatar

9. What do you think about very often?

Last Night of the World from the musical Miss Saigon

10. What is 2 + 2?

The Lord of the Dance from Michael Flatley’s Lord of the Dance soundtrack

11. What do you think of your best friend?

Oh, Mein Papa, by Eddie Calvert (I have no idea who this even is!)

12. What do you think of the person you like?

The Noisy Curlew, Farewell to Erin from A Taste of Ireland (collection of Irish songs)

13. What is your life story?

Damned for All Time/Blood Money from the musical Jesus Christ Superstar

14. What do you want to be when you grow up?

T-E-A-M from the musical You’re a Good Man Charlie Brown

15. What do you think of when you see the person you like?

Judas’ Death from the musical Jesus Christ Superstar

16. What will you dance to at your wedding?

Tonight It’s You by Cheap Trick

17. What will they play at your funeral?

Lio by Rick Springfield

18. What is your hobby/interest?

Tomorrow Night by Elvis Presley

19. What is your biggest fear?

All About Ruprecht from the musical Dirty Rotten Scoundrels
I think this one is really funny. This is from a famous scene in the 1988 movie that inspired the musical had Michael Caine passing himself off as a Prince and introducing a clingy, rich, would-be wife to his ape-like, mentally unstable "brother," named Ruprecht, whose appalling behavior included relieving himself at the dinner table.

The horror that is Ruprecht remains in the new musical re-imagining of the story, created by composer-lyricist David Yazbek, librettist Jeffrey Lane, director Jack O'Brien and choreographer Jerry Mitchell. On stage, John Lithgow is suave con man Lawrence Jameson and Norbert Leo Butz is his partner in crime, Freddy, who masquerades as addled Ruprecht.

Creating a Ruprecht sequence to rival the film, the musical has the brothers singing a child-like laundry-list song called "All About Ruprecht" that keeps topping itself, all in an effort to unhook a vulgar Oklahoma heiress. (Showing off Yazbek's dexterity, the song's verse rivals Noel Coward and includes topical references to modern royals).


20. What is your biggest secret?

Evening Primrose by Bernadette Peters

21. What do you think of your friends?

Tempted by Squeeze

Xtra Sharp

My good friend Rinda got me started on this energy tonic called Xtra Sharp. It’s an all-natural blend of herbs and minerals that acts as an energy booster. It is the foulest tasting thing you will ever put in your mouth. One review I read on the web described it as a “having a deathly ill monkey shitting into your mouth.” While I’ve never had the pleasure of meeting a deathly ill monkey, I think that about sums it up. But this stuff is amazing. It helps clear the fuzzies from my head and keeps me alert and going for hours. And there is no crash when it starts to wear off.

So here’s what’s in it…

Ingredients:

Xtra Sharp contains a proprietary blend of concentrated herbal extracts (525 mg per 30 ml).

* Alfalfa (Medicago sativa L.) herb aids absorbtion of nutrients, cellular detoxifier.
* Angelica (Angelica archangelica L.) root used as an invigorating tonic.
* Celery (Apium graveolens L.) seed cleansing properties and antiseptic action, diuretic and blood cleanser
* Chamomile (Matricaria recutita L.) flower sedative, pain killer, anti-inflammatory.
* Damiana (Turnera diffusa W.) leaf helps to regenerate hormones.
* Dandelion (Taraxacum off. W.) root has a significant cleansing action on liver and pancreas.
* Echinacea (Ech. Angustifolia DC.) root stimulating immune system, anti-cold remedy.
* Gentian (Gentiana lutea L.) root increases the absorption of nutrients, aphrodisiac, digestive acid.
* Ginkgo Biloba (Ginkgo Biloba L.) leaf improves circulation, memory enhancer.
* Ginseng (Panax ginseng C Meyer) root improves athletic performance.
* Grape (Vitis vinifera L.) seed detoxifier.
* Guarana (Paullina cupana H.B.K.) seed used for boosting energy levels.
* Horehound (Marrubium vulgare L.) herb acts to normalize heart rhythm, cough remedy.
* Licorice (Glycyrrhiza glabra L.) root anti-inflammatory, cough suppressant, good for asthma.
* Milk Thistle (Silybum marianum L.) fruit improves liver function, glactagogue.
* Passion Flower (Passiflora incarnata L.) herb can reduce anxiety, calming effect on central nervous system, dilates blood vessels.
* Polygala (Polygala senega L.) root fever and inflammation reducing substance.
* Sarsaparilla (Smilax aristoloch M.) root tonic with aphrodisiac properties.
* Saw Palmetto (Serenoa repens Bart.) fruit tonic that can strengthen bladder, antiseptic.
* Spirulina (Spirulina pratensis) algae immune system enhancer.
* Thyme (Thymus vulgaris L.) leaf tonic for the immune system, laryngitis, fatigue, colds, and flu.

Other ingredients:

Spring water, maltitol, glycerin, caramel color, potassium hydroxide, natural flavors, potassium hydroxide, methylparaben and propylparaben as preservatives.

I like the “natural flavors” part of the other ingredients list.

So if you need a great energy booster and feel like you can handle the taste, I highly recommend it. You can order it here.

BTW, it comes in a fruit flavored version, but I think that tastes even worse.

End of my commercial.

Superpowers

As some of my faithful readers may have noticed, I am attempting to post on my blog every day for a month. I’m not entirely sure I remember why I wanted to do this, but I put it on my 101 in 1001 list (found at my WYSIWYG Girl site) so therefore it must be done! I have been sadly lacking in any posts of substance for the past week. I’ve lamely posted stuff but nothing too interesting…mostly because I’ve run out of ideas. You guys have heard about my opinions on stuff and I can’t think of anything new to opine on. I could tell you more about my Farm Town addiction, or whine about my floors, or talk about how great my pets are, or how tired I am of being overweight, or how tired I am of being broke, but even I am bored with those topics, so I can’t imagine that you want to hear about them…again. The official theme according to NaBloPoMo is “tomorrow” but I think that is boring as well. I haven’t done anything remotely interesting lately that I could blog about. Work is boring, so I can’t blog about that. The pets haven’t even done anything interesting.

So I went online and did a search of blog topics (I’m such an internet nerd). Wow, there are some really boring ideas out there. But I ran across this site that I thought had some promising topics.

I thought I might write about “My Worst Injury Ever.” Then I realized this one has been done to death also, since my worst injury ever was when I broke my ankle. (if you’d like to revisit it, here’s the link) That is pretty well chronicled on this blog already. So that won’t work.

Then I thought about “My Favorite Vacation.” Well, this one was hard because I’ve loved all my vacations. The month I spent in New Zealand, the trip to Canada with my parents, grandmother and cousin Deb, and the first trip Greg & I took together are among my favorite favorites. I have lots of happy memories of all my trips, but not too many pictures I can post about them here because the pictures are from back when we used film to take pictures (remember that?). And if you will notice on my WYSIWYG Girl site, number 81 is still there as untouched: “81. Scan all negatives into the computer and store on some kind of lasting media.” So I should really save that idea until I can show you pictures with my descriptions.

Now I’ve finally decided to go with the “If I Had a Superpower” topic. I may have mentioned this one before, but I can’t remember. So I’ll do it now.

I’ve never been very good at just picking one thing. I don’t have one favorite movie or one favorite book or even one favorite food, so it’s kind of hard for me to limit myself to choosing just one superpower. I’ve always thought it would be great to be able to be invisible. Who wouldn’t want that as a superpower? And it would be nice to be able to see through things. I can think of a lot of practical applications for that one. If I was invisible I wouldn’t need super hearing because I could just go wherever and eavesdrop. And super hearing is Greg’s superpower and it’s a pain. If a fly fs down the street he can hear it and it wakes him up, so that one is out. Then I looked up “superpowers” in Google (see above internet nerd comment) to get some more ideas and found this whole big list to chose from.

So now I REALLY can’t choose just one.

But here’s one not on the list that I like. I’ve decided I want to be able to have the power to give and take away weight from people. If someone is sick and underweight, I’d be happy to give them some extra. Those that are packing around a few extra pounds, if they are nice to me, just might wake up to find they lost 20 pounds overnight! And those people that annoy me better watch out…I could use my powers for evil! If you are a meanie to me or mine you just might wake up to find you gained 50 pounds inexplicably. That’ll teach you!

Boy, I need to get a life.

Almost...

I almost blew the whole NoBloPoMo thing tonight by forgetting to post. I don't have anything important to say, but I have to post something. I really need to search out some good blog topics. Anyone have any ideas?

Evita

I went and saw Evita at the Broadway Rose last night. It was a lot of fun because Julie's mom, sister, and niece came with us. We had a great dinner at Gustov's before hand.

I really enjoyed it. Great costumes, great singers, great performance. It got five thumbs up from our group!

This review of the play is amusing. I'm not sure, but I think the author doesn't like the musical itself, although he seemed to like the perfomance.

Am I the Only One?

All right, people. Some of you have totally dropped the ball when it comes to blogging. Look down at my list of blogs I follow! Six out of the thirteen listed there haven’t posted in more than 6 months! And only two of you have posted in the last month! I know you people are out doing interesting things…post!

Of course, while I am trying to do the NaBloPoMo (National Blog Posting Month) this month I can’t brag about the substance of my posts. They’ve been pretty weak the last couple of days. But I am posting!

So get a move on people! Post! And Leah, when are you going to start your blog???? Or get on Facebook???? Or join the 21st century??? Okay that last one was a joke since you are an expert texter. And what happened to Mom's blog? And Greg's? I liked reading those!

And America Looses Another Great One

Did you see that John Hughes died? I’m devastated. There would have been no movies in the 80s worth watching without this man. Look at this list of movies he’s been involved with (thank you Wikipedia).

Writer

Delta House (1979) (TV Series)
National Lampoon's Class Reunion (1982)
At Ease (1983) (TV Series)
Mr. Mom (1983)
National Lampoon's Vacation (1983)
Nate and Hayes (1983) (with David Odell)
Sixteen Candles (1984)
The Breakfast Club (1985)
National Lampoon's European Vacation (1985; characters)
Weird Science (1985)
Pretty in Pink (1986)
Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986)
Some Kind of Wonderful (1987)
Planes, Trains & Automobiles (1987)
She's Having a Baby (1988)
The Great Outdoors (1988)
Uncle Buck (1989)
National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation (1989)
Home Alone (1990)
Career Opportunities (1991)
Dutch (1991)
Curly Sue (1991)
Beethoven (1992) (as Edmond Dantes)
Home Alone 2: Lost in New York (1992)
Dennis the Menace (1993)
Baby's Day Out (1994)
Miracle on 34th Street (1994)
101 Dalmatians (1996)
Flubber (1997)
Home Alone 3 (1997)
Reach The Rock (1998)
Just Visiting (2001) (with Jean-Marie Poire & Christian Clavier)
Maid in Manhattan (2002; story) (originally titled The Chambermaid) (as Edmond Dantes)
Drillbit Taylor (2008; story) (as Edmond Dantes)

Director

Sixteen Candles (1984)
The Breakfast Club (1985)
Weird Science (1985)
Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986)
Planes, Trains & Automobiles (1987)
She's Having a Baby (1988)
Uncle Buck (1989)
Curly Sue (1991)

Producer

The Breakfast Club (1985)
Pretty in Pink (1986; executive producer)
Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986)
Some Kind of Wonderful (1987)
Planes, Trains & Automobiles (1987)
She's Having a Baby (1988)
The Great Outdoors (1988; executive producer)
Uncle Buck (1989)
National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation (1989)
Home Alone (1990)
Career Opportunities (1991)
Only the Lonely (1991)
Dutch (1991)
Curly Sue (1991)
Home Alone 2: Lost in New York (1992)
Dennis the Menace (1993)
Baby's Day Out (1994)
Miracle on 34th Street (1994)
101 Dalmatians (1996)
Flubber (1997)
Home Alone 3 (1997)
Reach the Rock (1998)
New Port South (2001; executive producer)

So what’s your favorite John Hughes film? There are so many classics here, I just don’t know which one to pick! Ferris Bueller is a big one, but so is Vacation. And Planes, Trains. And Some Kind of Wonderful. Oh, forget it. I can’t pick one!

Almost...

Oops. I almost forgot to post today. Thank goodness the dogs woke me up to go outside before midnight, huh?

And since I don't have anything to say...that's it for this post. Cheating? Maybe. Oh well!

Like a Turtle

Could my internet be any slower? I know I have an old computer, but where is the lightning fast internet connection I'm supposed to have with Comcast? It's so freaking annoying to have to wait 5 minutes for everything to happen. Grrr.

Okay, that's my gripe for the day.

Stupid Facebook

I am spending far to much time on Facebook these days. There are all these great games and people to talk to! It's so much fun. Maiden got me started playing Farm Town and I'm spending all my time begging for people to hire me to work on their farms. I feel like one of those homeless people you see on the off-ramps of the freeway. "Will plow for coins!"

Sad.

I'm Meeellltttiiinnnggg

When I was at the Relay, the Gresham Police were selling these cool little doll pins. You could pick the color of their swoosh and everything. I just fell in love with them. They were little plastic pins that the gal said they put in the oven to melt it all together.

Just a tip...don't leave these things in your car when it is in the 90s outside or they end up like this:




I have no idea how I will get this part off, since it seems to have become one with the seat upholstery.


See how the side of her dress just melted off?


If anyone has any ideas how to get this crap off the seat, I'm all ears. I don't think Goo Gone is up to the job!