Sophie had been having tummy trouble more and more often in the last year. She'd been to the vet several times for vomiting and the fact that she was losing weight. We tried all kinds of food and finally found a raw food that she could keep down and liked, but she wasn't putting weight back on. She had tests and x-rays, but nothing was coming back with anything that pointed to one diagnoses. Dr. Tracy thought she might have pancreatitis, but nothing was significantly pointing that way with her blood work.
CLIENT INSTRUCTIONS:Sophie presented for abdominal ultrasound because of weight loss and on-going vomiting. Chest x-rays were taken and were clear.
Abdominal ultrasound showed an intestinal mass. This is relatively small, but it appears to be actually somewhat blocking the flow of food/fluid through the intestines. This is likely causing the vomiting and weight loss.
Sophie's left kidney is blocked, stretched and damaged. The ureter (the tube between thekidney and the bladder) appears blocked close to the kidney. I suspect that the inflammationand damage of the intestinal mass is impacting this tube and blocking the kidney.
There is a small amount of free fluid in the belly, this is likely secondary to one of the aboveissues.
Both of the above changes are felt to be extremely painful processes in humans with similarchanges.
Sophie is uncomfortable in her belly at least. In addition, she is in mild kidney failure and herpancreatic blood value is mildly elevated.
I have provided to options for Sophie;1) Surgical exploratory. See if we can get the mass out. See if the surgeon can relieve thepressure on the kidney and allow drainage. There are tubes we could potentially place to help hold open the ureter. However, scarring and long term damage are a concern. Removing the kidney is another possibility. Removing the kidney of a dog in renal failure carries a poorprognosis. This would be an aggressive and invasive surgery. This surgery would be relativelyexpensive (rough estimate $5-6,0000) with poor odds of survival and poor long termexpectations.
2) Humane euthanasia. We discussed quality of life and I gave some rough advice on things to monitor. I suspect that Sophie is painful but that she is hiding this pain, for the most part.Mr. Leibrand elected to take Sophie home, discuss with his wife and family.
At this point she was still acting like her normal self, just skinnier. She was still eating and eliminating, staying with us, poking her head into any bag we brought home, and all the other normal stuff she does.
We talked to our vet, who agreed with the other vet's assessment and advised us that we wouldn't have much more time with her. We chose to bring her home and provide palliative care as long as her quality of life was good.
I had the last week of June off and was able to spend it with her. As the days went by, she started to get weaker and pickier about what she was eating. Pretty soon she wouldn't eat her expensive raw food, but was still eating the yummy tripe. Then tripe wasn't doing it for her, but scramble egg was good. On Saturday the 29th she hit a turning point. She threw up in the late afternoon and didn't really bounce back. We gave her some anti-nausea medicine and kept up with her pain pills. She wasn't interested in eating much, though.
Things continued to go downhill for her the rest of the weekend. By the time I got home from work on Monday, July 1, I knew the time had come. She was very weak and not interested in eating. She had no energy and the life had gone out of her dark eyes. She sat with me in my chair with her head on my shoulder just resting. We made the appointment for 12:15.
She slept with me one last time on Monday night. I think I was touching her all night, but she hardly moved. I kept looking at the clock, knowing that I only had a few more hours with her.
Tuesday was really hard. Somehow knowing we had a time set to end her life seemed weird. We left about 11:00 and took her up Morgan Creek Natural Area, which is one of my favorite spots to take the girls. She walked around and sniffed, peed a little, and mostly just looked around and seemed to enjoy the sights. She was too weak to walk far, so we didn't go down to Carmen's Beach, which is about 1/2 a mile in. That was her favorite place there. She always liked to stand in the creek and drink the water for some reason.
We got to the vet at 12:00. Greg and I waited in the car, talking little. I think I was already crying when we took her in to the vet. The staff there was so great. They lead us into a room right away and we were able to set her down on the futon couch. Dr. Tracy came in and did a quick assessment of Sophie. She agreed that it was time for us to put her to sleep. She did more tending to Greg and I at that point and explained each step of the process. I had to sign a release that said I was the owner and gave my permission to terminate her life. Dr. Tracy gave us plenty of time to say goodbye. We both cried and told Sophie that we were sorry we couldn't make her better and that we loved her.
We chose to have the vet give a sedative first, and then once Sophie was asleep she would inject something to stop her heart.
I was holding her the whole time across my lap with her head in the crook of my elbow. She was so still and quiet and didn't even flinch when Dr. Tracy gave her the first injection. That more than anything, helped me know that we were making the right choice for her. I kept my hand on her chest and was able to watch it move with the beat of her heart and every breath.
She almost immediately was asleep after the injection and after about 5 minutes was breathing very slowly and her heart beat was slowing down. Dr. Tracy came in and gave her another shot and I started to feel her heartbeat slow down. After a couple of minutes, it just tapered off until I felt nothing. Dr. Tracy listened with her stethoscope and told us she was gone.
It was all very peaceful and seemed very painless for Sophie. Dr. Tracy was stroking her leg the whole time, Greg was petting her, and I had my hand on her chest and we were telling her that we loved her and would miss her. It was one of the hardest things I've ever done in my life.
The house seems so empty without her. Carmen seems depressed. I know I'm depressed and prone to bouts of sobbing for no apparent reason. The cats are very solicitous Whenever I start crying, Cleo comes up and makes me hold her and purrs. She is such an empath. If I'm somewhere where she can reach me, Carmen will lick my face and wag her tail. Zinger has let me pet him a lot more lately and we've played with his mousie.
We had her cremated. Today we picked up the remains. They had put them in a nice wooden box and gave us a paw print and some nice messages to go with them. I couldn't even read that stuff. I know I'll appreciate it later, but not yet.
I wanted to get this all down in my blog so that I would always remember how peaceful it was for her. I've been crying most of the time I've been typing it, but it is a good thing to remember.
These are some of the last pictures I took of her. I couldn't bring myself to take a picture that last day. She was just so skinny. These pictures are from late May, I think. She's pretty skinny here, too.
Goodbye, sweet girl. Mummy misses you.
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