INSTALLING A HUSBAND
Dear Tech Support,
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs such as
. Romance 9.5
. Personal Attention 6.5
and then installed undesirable programs such as
. NBA 5.0,
. NFL 3.0
. Golf Clubs 4.1.
Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.
Please note that I have tried running Nagg ing 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
What can I do?
Signed,
Desperate
*****************************************************************************>
DEAR DESPERATE,
First, keep in mind,
. Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while
. Husband 1.0 is an operating system.
Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.
. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.
However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1.
. Please note that Beer 6. 1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.
Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)
In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0-program These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend:
. Cooking 3.0 and
. Hot Lingerie 7.7.
Good Luck!
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Sunday, September 21, 2008
Sigh. It's Over.
I know, I know. It's been over a week since I went to Live & Breathe and I haven't posted a thing about it. I know you, my faithful readers, have been dying of curiosity to hear how the weekend went. Well, your wait is over. Here is the low down on the biggest letterboxing weekend EVER!
In a word, it was FANTASIC! I had so much fun. Live & Breathe was amazing. I have never been to an event like it.
I took Thursday - Monday off from work for this little shindig. Thursday I worked around the house getting things prepped and ready for Greg for while I was gone (laundry, dishes, dog food, etc) until about 12. I was supposed to meet up with Maiden1974 and pick up some folks from the airport and do some boxing, but that didn't quite work out, so I just went out for a few boxes on my own. I picked up two boxes in Orchard's Park, two at Leach Botanical Gardens (which is beautiful, by the way), attempted one at Willamette National Cemetery, attempted one at Happy Valley Park (and still didn't find the stupid thing), and picked up one at North Clackamas Park.
After that, I didn't do anything worth discussing. :-)
Saturday I got up bright and early and headed over to pick up Happy Papaya. We drove out to CCC and got two boxes there (Papaya got 3) then headed out to the camp.
Once we got there (after picking up a box outside the gates) we checked in and headed to our cabins. Marmy conscripted me to help with room identification and I found out the room I was supposed to be in only had 2 beds for 3 people. Rather than worry about that, I headed out to box. I ended up sleeping on the couch in one of the cabins, but since I hardly slept at all this wasn't a big deal.
Basically the next two days can be summed up thus:
Letterbox with group of people.
Eat.
Talk with fellow letterboxers and exchange.
Letterbox with more people.
Duck in the bathroom for a quick pee.
Letterbox with more people.
Eat.
Exchange.
Letterbox.
Laugh and have fun.
Letterbox.
Eat.
Sleep.
Letterbox some more.
I came home with the worst letterboxing hangover.
I was too busy talking, boxing, and generally having a good time to take more than about 3 pictures so I don't have any to show you. You can go on Atlas Quest and look at the pictures other people posted, though.
So here are the stats from the weekend:
Total stamps in new book = 251
Letterbox finds = 133 (which gives me 966 finds)
Exchanges = 32
Hitchhikers = 2
Postals = 4
Cooties = 3
Travelers = 32
Event Stamps = 48
Steps taken (all 3 days) = 60,410
Miles (all 3 days) = 22.883
Calories (all 3 days) = 2487
Wounds = 1 (small blister from ankle brace)
Hours of sleep = 6
When can we do it all again?
In a word, it was FANTASIC! I had so much fun. Live & Breathe was amazing. I have never been to an event like it.
I took Thursday - Monday off from work for this little shindig. Thursday I worked around the house getting things prepped and ready for Greg for while I was gone (laundry, dishes, dog food, etc) until about 12. I was supposed to meet up with Maiden1974 and pick up some folks from the airport and do some boxing, but that didn't quite work out, so I just went out for a few boxes on my own. I picked up two boxes in Orchard's Park, two at Leach Botanical Gardens (which is beautiful, by the way), attempted one at Willamette National Cemetery, attempted one at Happy Valley Park (and still didn't find the stupid thing), and picked up one at North Clackamas Park.
After that, I didn't do anything worth discussing. :-)
Saturday I got up bright and early and headed over to pick up Happy Papaya. We drove out to CCC and got two boxes there (Papaya got 3) then headed out to the camp.
Once we got there (after picking up a box outside the gates) we checked in and headed to our cabins. Marmy conscripted me to help with room identification and I found out the room I was supposed to be in only had 2 beds for 3 people. Rather than worry about that, I headed out to box. I ended up sleeping on the couch in one of the cabins, but since I hardly slept at all this wasn't a big deal.
Basically the next two days can be summed up thus:
Letterbox with group of people.
Eat.
Talk with fellow letterboxers and exchange.
Letterbox with more people.
Duck in the bathroom for a quick pee.
Letterbox with more people.
Eat.
Exchange.
Letterbox.
Laugh and have fun.
Letterbox.
Eat.
Sleep.
Letterbox some more.
I came home with the worst letterboxing hangover.
I was too busy talking, boxing, and generally having a good time to take more than about 3 pictures so I don't have any to show you. You can go on Atlas Quest and look at the pictures other people posted, though.
So here are the stats from the weekend:
Total stamps in new book = 251
Letterbox finds = 133 (which gives me 966 finds)
Exchanges = 32
Hitchhikers = 2
Postals = 4
Cooties = 3
Travelers = 32
Event Stamps = 48
Steps taken (all 3 days) = 60,410
Miles (all 3 days) = 22.883
Calories (all 3 days) = 2487
Wounds = 1 (small blister from ankle brace)
Hours of sleep = 6
When can we do it all again?
Tuesday, September 09, 2008
I'm Ready to Live & Breathe!
Less than 48 hours and the fun begins! I can't wait! I can't wait! Ican'twaitIcan'twaitIcan'twaitIcan'twait. Did I mention I can't wait?
I've spent the evening searching for all the letterboxing stuff I own - just to make sure I have everything I need. Amazing how it is spread over such a wide area. I can't find my original signature stamp and my button from a gathering long, long ago. Once I find those two things, I'm golden!
I am so looking forward to this weekend! Three days of letterboxing. Nothing to do BUT letterbox. I hear there are 200+ boxes hidden for the event. Woo hooo! If that's true, I can reach my 1000th find this weekend.
So my sweatshirt came today as well as my logbook. Yeah, I cut that a little close, but it got here. It will be so cool to have one logbook for this event.
I bet you can't wait until Monday and I blog all about it, now can you?
I've spent the evening searching for all the letterboxing stuff I own - just to make sure I have everything I need. Amazing how it is spread over such a wide area. I can't find my original signature stamp and my button from a gathering long, long ago. Once I find those two things, I'm golden!
I am so looking forward to this weekend! Three days of letterboxing. Nothing to do BUT letterbox. I hear there are 200+ boxes hidden for the event. Woo hooo! If that's true, I can reach my 1000th find this weekend.
So my sweatshirt came today as well as my logbook. Yeah, I cut that a little close, but it got here. It will be so cool to have one logbook for this event.
I bet you can't wait until Monday and I blog all about it, now can you?
Monday, September 08, 2008
Vote Now!
The Oregon Zoo is letting the public vote on the name for the baby elephant. Here are the choices:
Amul: Hindi for "priceless, of inestimable worth."
Bao: Chinese for "precious treasure."
Duc: (rhymes with hook or look): Vietnamese for "good, moral, desire." (Also is a portion of former Trail Blazer Kevin Duckworth's name, honoring the late basketball player.)
Hugo-Tu: This name honors the baby's mother, Rose-Tu, and maternal grandfather, Hugo. Hugo comes from the Germanic word for "mind, heart or spirit" and Tu is Vietnamese for "tree."
Samudra (nickname Sam): Hindi for "lord of the ocean." (The calf loves his baths!)
The voting goes through September 11th, so hurry to cast your vote now!
Amul: Hindi for "priceless, of inestimable worth."
Bao: Chinese for "precious treasure."
Duc: (rhymes with hook or look): Vietnamese for "good, moral, desire." (Also is a portion of former Trail Blazer Kevin Duckworth's name, honoring the late basketball player.)
Hugo-Tu: This name honors the baby's mother, Rose-Tu, and maternal grandfather, Hugo. Hugo comes from the Germanic word for "mind, heart or spirit" and Tu is Vietnamese for "tree."
Samudra (nickname Sam): Hindi for "lord of the ocean." (The calf loves his baths!)
The voting goes through September 11th, so hurry to cast your vote now!
Sunday, September 07, 2008
Carmen's Fortune
Greg & I had chinese food delivered the other night. Someone dropped the bag holding the fortune cookies and one of them must have gone under the counter. I heard crunching in the office today and looked over to see Carmen snacking on a fortune cookie. Her fortune read "You will be traveling to distant lands for business purposes."
Have you ever heard a less likely fortune in your life?
Have you ever heard a less likely fortune in your life?
Thursday, September 04, 2008
Wow! Five Years!
A very important event happened on September 1, 2008 and I forgot to blog about it. Can you guess what it is? I celebrated 5 years of letterboxing!! Wow! So I thought I’d better do an entire post about me and my letterboxing. So here it goes.
How I Got Into Letterboxing.
It’s all my friend Rinda’s fault. Rinda, or Sleepy Whippet as she is known in letterboxing circles, who I know through whippets, came out to have lunch with me at the Roadhouse in August 2003. When we were leaving, she said something about going to Blue Lake Park to find a letterbox. I thought she was talking about the mailing stores, and proceeded to tell her there was one up the road. She then explained letterboxing to me. I think she was looking for Der Mad Stamper’s Blue Lake box that day. I don’t know if she ever found it. I was very intrigued.
A few days later she invited me to go letterboxing with her at Milo McIver Park. My very first box was Clackamas River, by the Paisley Orca. I don’t think this box is still around, sadly enough. We did the “Making Faces” and “Jurassic Park” series that day. I logged 13 finds that day including finding a hitchhiker. I was totally hooked. I even stopped for another one on my way home from McIver.
I didn’t even have a trail name picked out yet when I did this. Or a stamp. I bought a butterfly stamp and just signed in as “Kris.” I’m not sure when I decided on Bookworm as my trail name, but it wasn’t too much later, I guess.
I didn’t carve my first signature stamp because I was too eager to get out there and box, but I had my first sig stamp made for me by Stamp Connections. Here is the image I used:
I conned someone, probably Maiden1974, into carving my second signature stamp for me. I can't find the image at the moment, but I'll post it sometime soon.
My third and current signature stamp I carved all by my lonesome (mostly because my friends that are better at carving than me had caught on to my little trick and made me do it myself). This is the one you will see out and about now. I can't find this image either, so you'll have to meet me at the Live & Breathe event to get it!
I had big plans of changing my letterboxing name here for my 5 year anniversary. I thought and thought and thought to come up with a name that sounded really cool and was totally me. I had a terrific name all picked out…Midnight Flamingo. Isn’t that great? I don’t really know what it means, but I think it sounds extra cool. I like flamingos, I like hot pink, and anytime you put an adjective in front of a word, especially Midnight, it sounds nifty. I carved a stamp for it and everything. And then Mr. Grumpy Pants asked me who Midnight Flamingo was and said it sounded like a porn star name. I’ve rather lost my taste for it now. So I guess I’ll stay Bookworm. I don’t know what my letterboxing friends would call me if I did change it.
Since then, I have racked up a lot more finds. By my count I’ve found 820 letterboxes. Here are my stats as recorded by me:
Placed: 16 (includes travelers)
Found: 820
Exchanged: 289
Hitchhikers: 73
Postals: 152
Cooties: 103
Travelers: 108
Event: 95
Atlas Quest has this totally cool feature that graphs and charts all the things that you’ve entered in to their data base. Not all the stamps I’ve collected are listed on Atlas Quest and I haven’t gone in and added the missing ones. This is really cool, too:
Total unique finds: 524
Total days since first find: 2,006
Total days with finds: 150
Finds per day: 0.26
Finds per boxing day: 3.49
Percent of boxing days: 7.5%
Best day: 54 (October 1, 2005) (this was the Joker’s Wild Gathering)
Most consecutive days with finds: 4 days
Longest find drought: 191 days (This must have been when I had my broken ankle)
There is more cool stats, but I can't get them to copy over in a readable format, and I don't feel like retyping it.
Here are a few pictures of me letterboxing for your entertainment.
This is one from my first letterboxing trip (I think). That's me, my mother-in-law Ann, and Rinda
How I Got Into Letterboxing.
It’s all my friend Rinda’s fault. Rinda, or Sleepy Whippet as she is known in letterboxing circles, who I know through whippets, came out to have lunch with me at the Roadhouse in August 2003. When we were leaving, she said something about going to Blue Lake Park to find a letterbox. I thought she was talking about the mailing stores, and proceeded to tell her there was one up the road. She then explained letterboxing to me. I think she was looking for Der Mad Stamper’s Blue Lake box that day. I don’t know if she ever found it. I was very intrigued.
A few days later she invited me to go letterboxing with her at Milo McIver Park. My very first box was Clackamas River, by the Paisley Orca. I don’t think this box is still around, sadly enough. We did the “Making Faces” and “Jurassic Park” series that day. I logged 13 finds that day including finding a hitchhiker. I was totally hooked. I even stopped for another one on my way home from McIver.
I didn’t even have a trail name picked out yet when I did this. Or a stamp. I bought a butterfly stamp and just signed in as “Kris.” I’m not sure when I decided on Bookworm as my trail name, but it wasn’t too much later, I guess.
I didn’t carve my first signature stamp because I was too eager to get out there and box, but I had my first sig stamp made for me by Stamp Connections. Here is the image I used:
I conned someone, probably Maiden1974, into carving my second signature stamp for me. I can't find the image at the moment, but I'll post it sometime soon.
My third and current signature stamp I carved all by my lonesome (mostly because my friends that are better at carving than me had caught on to my little trick and made me do it myself). This is the one you will see out and about now. I can't find this image either, so you'll have to meet me at the Live & Breathe event to get it!
I had big plans of changing my letterboxing name here for my 5 year anniversary. I thought and thought and thought to come up with a name that sounded really cool and was totally me. I had a terrific name all picked out…Midnight Flamingo. Isn’t that great? I don’t really know what it means, but I think it sounds extra cool. I like flamingos, I like hot pink, and anytime you put an adjective in front of a word, especially Midnight, it sounds nifty. I carved a stamp for it and everything. And then Mr. Grumpy Pants asked me who Midnight Flamingo was and said it sounded like a porn star name. I’ve rather lost my taste for it now. So I guess I’ll stay Bookworm. I don’t know what my letterboxing friends would call me if I did change it.
Since then, I have racked up a lot more finds. By my count I’ve found 820 letterboxes. Here are my stats as recorded by me:
Placed: 16 (includes travelers)
Found: 820
Exchanged: 289
Hitchhikers: 73
Postals: 152
Cooties: 103
Travelers: 108
Event: 95
Atlas Quest has this totally cool feature that graphs and charts all the things that you’ve entered in to their data base. Not all the stamps I’ve collected are listed on Atlas Quest and I haven’t gone in and added the missing ones. This is really cool, too:
Total unique finds: 524
Total days since first find: 2,006
Total days with finds: 150
Finds per day: 0.26
Finds per boxing day: 3.49
Percent of boxing days: 7.5%
Best day: 54 (October 1, 2005) (this was the Joker’s Wild Gathering)
Most consecutive days with finds: 4 days
Longest find drought: 191 days (This must have been when I had my broken ankle)
There is more cool stats, but I can't get them to copy over in a readable format, and I don't feel like retyping it.
Here are a few pictures of me letterboxing for your entertainment.
This is one from my first letterboxing trip (I think). That's me, my mother-in-law Ann, and Rinda
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